this is me.

a mama trying really hard, daily.  yet falling short every day.  in between the messy and busy I often fall very short.  patience is sheet thin and my voice lacking love and warmth.  those are the days that i am left no choice but to give myself grace and chose to do better tomorrow.

and when tomorrow comes, i sip off of that new cup of grace and do just that.  better.  i love harder.  laugh longer.  hug tighter.  and make many deposits that will keep from over-drafting their love accounts.

this mama business is about the hardest thing I’ve ever done.  but it’s without a doubt the best part of my life.  i can’t imagine not having this kind of love in my heart.

this little note is to all you awesome mama’s out there who are just really trying your best:

while wiping up pee puddles on the floor because you are knee deep in potty training, your two year old dumps out her bag of crackers simply because she thinks it’s super fun to dump everything out.  all the time.  she follows it up with a proud, “yay, i did it!”.  teaching your son how to tie his shoe while feeling like a failure because he should probably already know this but you’ve never taught him.  he catches on quickly because he’s been ready for probably a few years.  feeling guilty for putting the tv on just so you can read for a bit.  i feel really selfish for that too.  the potty training two-year-old picks the only 9 x 7 slab of carpet in a house covered in hardwood and tile to poo on.  then steps in it and tracks it down the hallway.  the dishes pile up faster than i can wash.  the laundry basket spills over while the clothes in the dryer need folded and put away.  and probably re-fluffed before you start folding.   the fighting seems endless and the tantrums over not letting your baby drink your bragg’s liquid aminos are starting to get to me.  walking down the hall only to notice that every single room is a disaster area.  that quiet moment followed by a crash and a little face that looks sorry for spilling an entire bag of rice all over the kitchen.  you are out of grace.  out of patience.  all you feel are fumes.  they feel your fumes.  they feel your anger toward them.  it wasn’t them.  it was all of it.  you’re overwhelmed and then pinterest is telling us to do more…to BE MORE.  i mean dang, it’s hard enough to teach them to say ‘please’ and ‘thank you’ without feeling the pressure to turn all their lunches into zoo animals while coordinating a matching craft to match.

oh but you sweet sweet mama’s out there…i get it.  you are not alone.  you aren’t the only one who thinks you are screwing everything up.  when you make it to the end of those really hard mama days while still painfully loving and adoring your littles…this is what makes you my hero.  we’ve got this, mama’s.  we’ve so got this.

because love.  we love those little mess-makers more than we can ever fathom.  i love loving my babies.  it’s almost more than i can bare at times. 

it truly is.

here’s to tomorrows beautiful mess.

we’ve got this!

in HIM and in health,

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