it’s dangerous when i get behind the computer screen in one of these moods.  and it’s even more dangerous when i have the song, “and i think to myself, what a wonderful world.”, softly playing on repeat. 

this post might be random.  it might get spiritual.  it will get funny.  and it will come straight from my heart.  because i sit here with a candle flickering at me, that ridiculously happy song playing, and a hot cup of chamomile tea at my reach. 

i purposefully created this specific ambiance, ’cause this mama wanted to write tonight.  and i wanted to set an intimate, writing-inspired tone.  i felt deserving of it.  this is my special treat to myself for the day. 

writing helps me keep track of my busy, creative mind.  it also helps me lock in all these fleeting memories that i make with my family.  it helps me purge some of my thoughts so that i have plenty of room for the next dose.  it’s like a memory bank where i keep making deposits.    k   

i’m always trying to find creative ways to keep my littles busy throughout our days.  being a stay-at-home-mom is by biggest blessing, to date.  i love this opportunity to be the hands and heart behind their childhood.  but, it’s tough.  i don’t want to mess them up.  i’m responsible for raising little people that turn into big people.  and that is a heavy load.  a load, might i add, that i hand back over to Jesus every night.  i do my very best, of that i am certain.  and i’ve never tried harder at anything in my life as i do at being a mother, but still, i fall short.  daily.  and some days it seems like constantly.

i do not have this parenting thing all figured out.  i’m always working on something.  i’m always apologizing for something.  but i do have some things in my life figured out, and that is how to create a good, joy-filled, happy life.  and hopefully my children will follow suit.

Creating my happy:

i don’t mind the extra prep work to create a date-night-in with the husband.  we’ve been really liking these nights lately.  we sit around the table to a meal that was made with a little extra love, discuss our family goals, or our individual dreams.  but mostly we have an uninterrupted conversation.  no kids.  no phones.  just us.

oh and the laughter.  that’s my favorite part.

and i like to bring the food out on platters, and we linger around the table for over an hour after we’ve eaten.  and if i have to pee (yeah, i said “pee”), i ignore it.  i don’t want to interrupt our conversation.  and it also shows the husband that he is worth the extra effort.  he is definitely the best friend i’ll ever have.  and i want our children to see a strong marriage, so they will desire the same.  husband and i both desire this.

it’s great to open up the blinds, let the sun light seep through the window, and throw a fresh box of crayons on the table, and watch them color.  if you’re not careful, you can get teary eyed for no reason other than you love them so.

or you can capture moments where all three of them are playing quietly together.  it doesn’t get any happier than that in a mama’s heart.

or you can serve their morning juice in true tea party fashion.  which automatically includes the big brother, who never joins in on this girly goodness.  but, brother never refuses apple juice. sucker…

sister was thrilled!!

one day last week, it was actually sunny, long-sleeve weather out.  the girls were napping, and i needed to get laundry done.  so i brought my favorite sock matcher-upper out back for some vitamin-D, and a little quality mama/son time. 

again, creating happy:

and having lucy pose for me before her dance class.  happy:

sneaking up on this:


playing with cousins on an otherwise blah day.  happy:

taking advantage of the free-every-friday-in-february special that our local zoo has going on.  and inviting cousins to tag along.  happy

and long, colorful, flowy skirts paired with .49 cent goodwill belts.  oh, fashion makes me happy.  it’s cool, nathan chopped off my face. 

i like to operate in the good.  i like things bright and cheery.  but, now listen, i promise there has been plenty of fits, spilled messes, diaper explosions,  barking at the husband for no apparent reason, and one more exhausted mommy that i could write about.  but happy always trumps those things.  always.

my thoughts are so tightly wrapped around my five member family, that often times it’s as though the outside world doesn’t exist.  except that my mind is so tightly wrapped around the outside world, too.  i care about other people immensely.  especially the broken and hopeless.  those random strangers who look sad deep, deep in their eyes.  i always go home and think about them, and pray.  i want to help.  i want to make a difference in that persons future.  i desperately want to make them happy.  and i feel like i can.  i feel like we all can. 

i have this vision in my head, constantly, of what this world would look like if every single person went about their day always looking for a way to spread goodness, kindness, and joy.  i truly believe in the goodness of mankind.  and i like my vision.

i want to do my part.  i want to inspire my children to do their part.  if i had one wish, it would be that everyone in this world were truly happy.  life kind of just falls into place when joy is your main ingredient.

if you look for something good, you’ll find it.  if you look for something bad, you’ll find it.

and lucy?

she never waits for a storm to pass.  she grabs her rain boots, umbrella, and laughs the storm through.

word to your mother.

pause button please!


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